# Name the feeling before you answer

> Communication: name one of Plutchik's eight before you answer. One word, then the factual sentence. No therapy script.
> Quelle: https://kikiwama.com/en/wissen/name-the-feeling-before-you-answer · 2026-09-23 · Kikiwama Redaktion

**Feeling before the answer:** You name one of Plutchik's eight feelings, quietly, before you send the sentence. Then comes the matter. The word is a pause, not a talk about your depth.

## Kurz gesagt

- **Eight words are enough.** Joy, trust, fear, surprise, sadness, disgust, anger, anticipation.
- **The word stays with you** when the other person does not need it.
- **The answer gets shorter.** Because the anger no longer rides along as an argument.
- **No script from a course.** You do not owe anyone an I-statement with three clauses.

## The pause before the sentence

Someone sends you a line that lands. Your fingers are faster than the situation. In that second, one word from the eight: anger, fear, surprise. Out loud or only in your head. Then the matter, in one sentence, without shipping the word if it does not help the matter.

[Plutchik's wheel](/wissen/plutchik-emotionen-rad) is built for this: a shelf, not a diagnosis. Shame and the whole inner novel stay out. There is [a separate piece](/en/wissen/shame-is-not-a-character) for that. Here the point is the answer that goes out in the next two minutes.

## Why the course sentence is often worse

"When you do x, I feel y, because I need z." Sometimes that clears the air. Often the other person hears a lecture and looks for the exit. You can have named the feeling without exporting it. The message then contains only what is to be done: the date, the no, the number.

| Basket | What sits in it |
| --- | --- |
| Fact | A reply that leaves in the heat mixes the matter with the feeling. You can see it in messages you would phrase differently an hour later. |
| Hypothesis | A named feeling that is not sent along shortens the message. |
| Folklore | "Good communication always adds the feeling." Sometimes the feeling is only the reason you wait. |

## Two lines on the map

Line one: the word. Line two: the sentence you actually send. [Speak both](/try), send only the second. If you send the first anyway, that is a decision, not a duty from a workshop.

## Häufige Fragen

### What if none of the eight words fits?

Take the nearest and send the matter. A ninth word does not make the message more precise.

### Should I never say the feeling?

Say it when the other person needs it to understand the matter. Then one word, not a biography.